Embrace your 'Sexy Dag' and become truely intimate

It was quite a few years ago my ex hubby and I were in a trendy bar on Chapel st in Melbourne where we coined the word “Sexy Dag”.

Chapel st is the place to go if you are young and want to be seen. Lined with upmarket fashion shops, cool coffee joints and nightclubs, it is an iconic part of Melbourne.

Friday night and every bar on Chapel st was packed and pumping. We were surrounded by young, smartly dressed, higher income earning ‘yuppies’. (Like dag another Aussie word meaning young professional person working in the city).

We always kind of felt like imposters in Chapel st even though we were renting a house a short walk from all the action. We were country kids then had spent 10 years sailing around Australia. We called ourselves hedonistic adventurers and were a long way off being trendy yuppies.

On that night in that bar you could feel the energy of needing to be noticed from all these young gorgeous people. Only one person stood out that night and she is what we called a “Sexy Dag”.

The short petite bar maid all in black with her standard hospitality apron on, sneakers and smile caught our attention. Her energy was different. She wasn’t there to impress anyone and yet she impressed us. She was comfortable in her own skin, she was sexy…. and yet daggy, which made her even sexier. “Dag” is an Australian word originally used to describe the wool of a sheep that hung off its rear matted with you know what.

In Australia we have created our own dialect called “slang”. We have taken the word Dag and applied it to people we think are unfashionable, awkward or eccentric.

I love the phrase sexy Dag because it describes someone who is certainly not trying to be sexy but is sexy naturally because they are not trying to be sexy. They don’t need to be someone they aren’t because they already are uniquely sexy. It’s an energy. It’s like being a guru and not knowing that you are a guru and certainly never claiming you are a guru.

Being a “Sexy Dag” is about exuding confidence. It is not a try hard confidence or an ego inflated confidence, it is confidence that comes from self validation. This is at the core of successful and highly passionate relationships – self validation. The ability to validate our self is not needing someone else’s approval to love ourself. It is the most empowering state and a very sexy and attractive state. It gives us the ability to become truely intimate. When we are not looking for validation we no longer hide any (perceived) undesirable aspects of ourself. We can truely be ourself in the presence of another. It can also help us sort out relationship potential in others.

We often put on appearances when we date and sometimes its not until some time down the track into the relationship that we really start to get to know a person and visa vera. Sometimes we are already so deeply entrenched in the relationship it becomes very difficult to break up when we feel that would be the best course of action.

Embracing our “sexy dag” and becoming truely intimate as we approach relationships will change the whole energy of the relationship and possibly the course and always for the better no matter how it turns out.

Become intimately inspired and to tap into your sexy dag, your sexual energy and empower yourself with self validation try an Intimate Inspiration Meditation.

Intimate Inspirations Meditations

I Know how to collaborate with my subconscious mind

Our mind is geared towards pleasure and very good at shrinking away from pain. Our mind does not like pain and tries its upmost to protect us from pain. But pain is perception. Pain is what our mind judges to be painful. It is our judgments alone that determine whether our body can handle pain. It is our thoughts and our self talk that determine our reaction to pain.

If our mind judges social interactions as painful, our body will respond. Our palms become sweaty, our breathing faster, our stomach may feel knotted up. These are real physical reactions to a thought, an ingrained program in our subconscious. They reinforce to our mind and subconscious that yes indeed social interactions are painful and should be avoided.

If we say to ourself “study is so boring”, our subconscious mind will collaborate with our mind and body to help us avoid this perceived painful situation of study, and lead us down the path of distraction. Often this makes the urgency and weight of getting through study become even more painful to address.

So how can we become more collaborative with our mind and subconscious in a positive way so that we can drive our life in the direction we want to go? If we let our subconscious continue to make our decisions based on pain avoidance our life will take a course of its own and we won’t end up achieving our greatest desires. We will find ourself living a life that doesn’t feel like ours.

I explored the power of hypnosis in my 20’s and used it as a fun game. The more I used it, the more it evolved. I taught my brain and body to wake up skinnier each day. I transformed my body from frumpy into bikini model. This was pretty exciting for a 20 year old. I trained my brain to wake me up early and trained my body to love heavy manual labour for my goal of renovating a 35ft sailing catamaran ( while still working 4 days a week).

There was a consequence I didn’t expect when I lost all my frumpy weight and increased my fitness through working on my boat every spare minute. Quite unforeseen and pleasantly surprising. I found a new way to use pleasure as a reward for hard work. The pleasure I used was self pleasuring. My self pleasuring turned into orgasm and in the past orgasm was hard to achieve. It was an effort to obtain and often took ages to climax.

Not anymore. With pleasure as my reward, my reward multiplied itself naturally and BOOM…….. I discovered I was multi orgasmic. Nice surprise for a woman just about to turn 30. I felt elated and a little ripped off that I’d missed so many years of not being multi orgasmic.

What came next was even more astounding. The next phase after renovating a sailing boat, a feat that I am still quite proud of, is of course, sailing. When you are out on the water and having been cruising for a couple of months, your mind changes naturally. All the stress and urgency that you were carrying and didn’t even know you were carrying dissolves. You start to feel really good. Bring on the pleasure! My mind loves pleasure. Our minds also love and crave challenge, stimulation and creativity.

Sailing in remote areas means a few things. Remember I was still only 30 and this was 2001. I didn’t own a mobile phone, smart phones weren’t around yet. I couldn’t afford satellite internet and internet was still quite slow and sketchy. There was no TV coverage. Options were entertainment were simple and naturally pure. Lots of exercise, fresh air, fresh fish and amazing scenery. I read books.

Have you ever come across a book that completely changed your life? Think and Grow Rich was mine. In particular one chapter… Chapter 11: The Mystery of Sex Transmutation. I took 4 weeks to read, reread, dissect, study, experiment and absorb Napoleon Hills Think and Grow Rich. I kept coming back to Sex Transmutation.

What happened next changed my life irreversibly for the better. I altered the way I used hypnosis. I discovered a way to combine Sex Transmutation and hypnosis that sped up and supercharged my connection with my subconscious mind. This is a tool so powerful I learnt that you really do have to be careful with what you wish for and program into your subconscious mind. Since my self discovery in 2001 I have explored, experimented, studied and out into practice a super charged orgasmic form of self hypnosis.

Originally I called it ‘bar stooling’. Funnily enough I used a bar stool as an upright prop to help me reach orgasm. I have evolved, my methods have evolved, I now call it Orgasmic Flow.

I now know how to rewrite my subconscious mind completely and in a fraction of the time it takes to reinforce a habit. I know how to obligate limiting beliefs and replace them with empowering scripts that take my life in the direction I want to go. I know how to tap into the creative genius that finds solutions and inspirations beyond ordinary thinking.

The biggest challenge is deciding what new codes and programs you want to install in your subconscious mind. It is always best to start with simple, basic empowering ones. Small steps and small changes are magnified and if you take it increment by increment the exponential change is profound.

During my journey in my 30’s I wrote down all my ‘new programmes’ that I used to retrain my subconscious mind. I called them my Intimate Inspirations. They have inspired my life so much I want to share them with other women and men on a journey of self development and discovery. I am doing this on youtube in the form of meditations that you listen to while you are self pleasuring. Here is the link to my Youtube channel Intimate Inspirations.

In 2009 I published my first book, The Currency of Sexual Energy, the art of sexual transmutation. I wrote this book from a state of orgasmic flow. At the time I was still in the early days of discovering and articulating what I was discovering. I was in a constant state of Orgasmc Flow. I almost felt too good.

I made Sexual Transmutation my work, my passion, my daily inspiration. I can honestly say I changed peoples lives. Robert (name changed to protect privacy) aged 60, had led a reclusive and fearful life after sexual abuse at the age of 9. After his first session with me the nightmares ceased. After 6 sessions he was an excited new man ready to face the world. His mind had kept him trapped in a state of abuse for all his life. Sexual Transmutation had rewired his subconscious mind allowing him to be a functioning and happy adult.

Highly successful and seemingly powerful businessmen (but very unhappy) redirected their lives towards fulfilment and connection though the work of Sexual Transmutation. The reward for me was two fold. I loved helping people and in the process I was speaking my passion, walking my talk. But then…..

beware of the way our mind tricks us

My mind felt weird and uncomfortable with feeling good all the time. I was on a natural high every single day. I wasn’t used to it. This is also a trick of the mind to be mindful of. The mind gravitates to what it is familiar with. If your mind is familiar with struggle, negativity, criticism, it will gravitate back to what it knows. It will sabotage the unfamiliar feelings of ‘feeling too good’. It will make up doomsday stories that cloud your positive state. This is certainly what happened to me. I couldn’t understand how I could feel so good all the time. I will tell myself not to feel so good or something and will happen. OMG! the stories we make up in our mind! It’s kind of like “bad things always happen in 3’s”. Do you ever hear your self saying this?

Become mindful of the tricks your mind plays so that you can over write them ASAP. The more you practice rewriting your subconscious and the more positive programs you can install, you will begin to build resistance to the tricks your mind plays to sabotage your good work. BUT you will never be exonerated from needing to be mindful. A negative program can creep back in and if you are not mindful a virus will spread.

I certainly wasn’t exonerated from a negative virus creeping in. I started doubting what I was doing. An old program from social conditioning cropped up….. Sex…… My subconscious programming installed from a very young age labelled the work I was doing as ‘Sex Work’. Yes I was working with people addressing their sexual energy, the link between the subconscious mind and sexual transmutation. I was not however involved in sex with my clients. The fact that I was talking about it brought up child hood programming that did not even allow the mention of the word. As a young teenager, I want even told about periods. My sex education involved being handed a book about growing up.

The viral program that shrunk my world from my passion took over and I sabotaged my business completely. However, the positive programs were still there. I just needed to decode and understand what I had just done to myself and my business. It took me quite some time, a lot of research and study to get to the bottom of my saboteur. It was a journey I had to take to experience the most important lesson so I could continue my work. OYoga and Orgasmic Flow evolved and I can continue with more wisdom and capability.

Yes Orgasmic Flow is a powerful practice and I think consistency with any practice ensures the best results. Orgasmic Flow needs to become your own practice. You need to find a way that you can reach your flow and able to return to this state when ever you decide. Intimate Inspirations need to come from you. Only you can know how you want to retrain your subconscious. Remember to always start simple.

Recently I have been inspired by the work of Marisa Peer, a world renowned hypnotist. Her work has reached thousands of people (millions on YouTube) and her main message is { I am enough }. This simple but highly effective mantra has turned lives around and even saved people from depression and suicide. Where do you need to start? How can you retrieve your most damaging beliefs and turn them around into intimate inspirations? It’s time to start exploring.

Zone out~ Meditation in daily life

Do you day dream? Do you go into a trance for a minute or two until something or someone snaps you out of it? Do you lose track of what you are meant to be doing and for a split second forget even where you are?

Don’t criticize yourself for moments like these, Savour them. It often feels like you are checking out for a brief time. Allow it to happen. Give yourself a rest, a break from the world and it’s motion and noise. You are actually meditating. Sometimes I find myself even doing it at the traffic lights. It’s ok, there will always be someone behind you to snap you out of it when the light turns green.

Next time you have to write something down and it’s funny how we are doing this less and less because of our smart phones, but when you do, notice how you are gripping your pen. Is it tight? Are your fingers knotted up? Are you pressing too hard? Can you relax your grip and release the pressure? Can you make writtting a short note a meditation? These small seemingly insignificant moments shine the light on how stressed we really are. By releasing your grip and writing mindfully you are retraining your mind and body that is so conditioned to hold on to stress and anxiety. You may not even realise how much you are holding on to until you let go of your pen hold.

Find meditation in every moment of your day.

Zone out and enjoy it! If someone questions you tell them. Oh I was just meditating.

I think the most common and easiest place and time to meditate is in the shower. We can stand there and just let the water run over our shoulders and it actually feels like the stress is washing away. Use these moments, become mindful of more moments like these each day when you can relax your mind. Your brain finds it hard to switch off for too long so give it small breaks all through the day. These small gaps in your thinking allow the light to seep in, inspiration will tap you unexpectedly on the shoulder.

Return to yourself, homeostasis. Zone out and enjoy it. Give yourself the gift of returning to yourself.

Reduce Stress and Anxiety and improve your sleep

Sleep! This is a catch 22. Lack of sleep cause stress and anxiety in particular sleep anxiety. Being anxious about getting to sleep and getting enough sleep. Not enough sleep then causes more stress and anxiety.

Sleeping pills are a wolf in sheep’s clothing. They actually rob you of real natural sleep. They put you in a coma similar to too much alcohol. You wake up feeling worse.

To get more sleep first you have to reduce your stress and anxiety. It’s your thoughts that keep you awake at night. How?

Remember once upon a time you slept really well. When was that? How was your life then? What were you doing daily unconsciously?

Here are my top tips to reduce stress and anxiety and get more sleep.

  1. Yoga … of course
  2. Swimming … swimming like yoga requires controlled deep breaths. This way of breathing changes the chemistry of your body and the chemistry of stress.
  3. Connect with nature and sunlight daily. Your body needs sunlight to regulate your internal circadian rhythm. Your soul needs to be reminded that you are a part of nature.
  4. Read a book at night instead of TV or screen time. Studies are highlighting the affect of blue light from screens are a big cause of interrupted sleep.
  5. Address the way you use your smart phone. Instead of spending time flicking through Facebook, choose some good podcasts to follow and listen to. Alternatively download some audible books for inspiration and relaxation. We are so visually overstimulated. Our minds are in information overload from self pro-ported experts and gurus.
  6. Flow- flow is a creative force without judgment. What keeps us awake at night? Judgment. Judgment about our day, judgment about what others did that upset us. Judgment about how we are not good enough. To go into ‘sleep flow’ we have to stop our judging. How do we do that? We have to melt our thoughts and mash them into abstract images. When we do this, the emotions that come with the judgments dissipate and we are left with melting thoughts and a melting body. This might take some practice and the best way to practice is by doing this exact practice during the day with OYoga. Often when we reach for orgasm or judge our ability to orgasm it disconnects us from flow and keeps it further from attaining just like sleep sometimes evades is.

Finding flow into sleep is so similar to finding flow into an orgasmic state. So melt your thoughts when you are practicing OYoga. Meld then into abstract colours. See them change and morph just like a kaleidoscope. Images will appear and then when we don’t judge them or think about them they meld into something else. Let these thoughts come and go, don’t hold onto any of them. It is the inspiration that springs up when your practice is over that you may want to capture and write down. As is with sleep. Do this same process at night and the answers to life will come in your dreams.

Sweet flow …. sweet dreams …. sweet life..

Are you Spiritually Healthy?

Why and how can we take more care of our spiritual health?

Modern psychologist are discovering that our modern mental health issues like depression and anxiety are so closely related to our spiritual health. The two are directly linked.

Our spiritual health affects our mental health.

In turn our spiritual and mental health affects all our relationships, our perception of the world and our physical health.

Psychologists and theologians are also discovering that

our sexuality is directly linked to our spiritual health

and of course, in turn our mental and physical health.

So this means when our sexuality is suppressed, repressed or demonized in any way by ourselves or others our spiritual health suffers. We become less inspired about life and we start to experience things like depression and anxiety.

I don’t think I need to go into the history of sexual oppression because that would take a couple of volumes. We all know and still feel the sexual unease and confusion society still suffers from. The minority’s feel it the most; women and homosexuals.

So let’s focus on the positive and the future and what we can do for our own internal growth and health. In any relationship when one person can hold onto themselves it changes the whole dynamics.

When you know who you are at your deepest core which includes your sexuality and spiritual self, then your self worth is not negotiable. Taking care of your mental and spiritual health is not negotiable. It is not something that needs to be managed by medication or therapy. It is something that needs to be nurtured by YOU and you only. You are the gate keeper to your soul. Don’t let the cows trample your garden. Water your garden with inspiration that speaks to your soul and you will naturally flourish.

We NEED to do this for our selves, our kids, our relationships and for society. We can change our world. We can raise our vibrations and by osmosis, those around us.

Spirituality is like education. There are many versions, many opinions, many authority’s. We think we have to do this course or finish this degree to be someone to “know”. One of the most important lessons I have learnt in life is;

I am in charge of my own education.

That doesn’t mean doing the right degree or course. It means going deeper and finding out for myself. It means doing my own research beyond what you are meant to know and learn.

The same applies to spirituality. You can not place your spiritual health and soul in the hands of one minister, or priest or so called spiritual authority.

YOU are the only spiritual authority for your soul.

Religion takes this authority away.

I don’t have a religion. I don’t have a spiritual system. I am spiritual because my soul speaks to me.

There are many spiritual practices out there and I don’t think you should follow any of them. Gather, learn, feed your soul. Create your own spiritual practice. Nurture your soul and your life will be amazing.

When I was a kid I just wanted to be normal, to fit in. Now it’s the exact opposite. I am not satisfied with normal and acceptable. I want an exception life. My spirit yearns for an exceptional life. Normal is like being chained to the earth and a certain way of living. Normal is following the rules of oppression.

Is your spirit free? Do you have waves of euphoria wash over. You for no reason? If you follow ‘the norm’ waves of euphoria are very rare. If you are. Normal moments free of anxiety and pressure are rare. Our base line is busy and stressed. We don’t leave room in our life for nurturing our spirit and soul.

Make room for your spiritual health. Make time to nurture your soul. Without it, life is a prison.

Sensual Awareness Creates Pure Intimacy

This meditation is a guided focussing tool for your sensual and sexual energy. It is a tool to enhance the practice of Sexual Transmutation, the process of channeling your sexual energy for creativity and inspiration. Inspiration is the key – to become in-spirit.
Orgasms are for inspiration and to be able to tap into, and channel our orgasms can profoundly change our life.
Intimate Inspirations are my contribution to honouring the divine feminine and in doing so, honouring the divine in the masculine as well.

This mediation guides you through the process of recognising pure intimacy.
Find out what makes intimacy pure. Sensual awareness will lead us to pure intimacy.


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